Here We Go Again...

I have had the worst time lately. Everything seems to be breaking, something I've been ranting about for a while now. It's frustrating, you know, for everything you own to break down when you can't at all afford to replace it. We were cold all winter, even though it wasn't exactly freezing here, because our heater decided to die and we couldn't afford to replace the coils. Then, the dishwasher, the microwave, the toaster, and the coffee pot followed. It has been so incredibly... hard. Really, really hard, because I feel completely helpless to do anything about it.

Of course, we replaced the small stuff, the microwave, toaster, coffee pot, and we hoped and prayed that nothing else would die. Our fridge, washer, and dryer are all 8 years old, are they next? I sure hope not, but I'm constantly afraid that they are. And until yesterday they were the biggest concern, but then my computer started acting up. I bought it early in 2009, so it's getting up there and it's not under warranty. But, it has always run like a dream and I've never really worried about it. Then it started freaking out and I can't afford to buy a new one right now. Fantastic.

So today, I backed everything up and ran the Alienware Re-spawn software on my computer. It basically sets everything back to factory, so that "respawns" exactly like it was when I bought it. It took a while, but everything's back up and running (almost). World of Warcraft is still installing, of course, but everything else is working again and I haven't had any problem so far. Althought, I also haven't updated my video graphics (possibly the source of the trouble), so we'll see.

What isn't awesome is that I didn't get my pictures properly backed up, that is, I didn't wait for them to completely upload to Dropbox, so I lost all of my pictures and my character sheets (for my table top RPGs) that were on my system, I also lost all of my ebooks. Not the stuff for my Kindle, of course, but the random misc. e-books I've collected from around the web, including the cookbooks I've downloaded. That really bums me out, but most of them can be re-downloaded from my email, I think.

What really hurts is the pictures. All of my pictures of my pets, including Chummer who passed away in 2005, all my pictures of myself, of Matt, of friends and family, of my trip to CA a few years ago, of my trips to Plainview when I went to see my Grandma, of the last few 4th of July holidays, of last Christmas (2010), all of it... gone. I am so distraught. We're talking 4.5GB of pictures, just... just gone. So now I get to come to terms with the fact that I can't get all of that stuff back, no matter how much I want it to be so, and move forward. I'll be taking many more pictures, of course, and making sure to back them up more carefully next time. Fortunately, most of my recent pictures are instagr.am, which means they're on my phone and on the web. Also, I've uploaded some pictures to Facebook and to my server space, so I haven't lost absolutely everything.

Still, I don't feel much better. I just hope the "respawn" fixed my issues so that my computer works again. If it doesn't, then I lost all of that stuff for nothing. I hope that's not the case, I'll be even more heartbroken than I already am. Fortunately, I didn't lose my writing, school work, class materials, or thesis. Thank goodness for small miracles.

**Update: Turns out that the format didn't work. My system is still messed up, moreso than before, if that's possible. Getting the BSOD much more frequently now. Fantastic, really. :( So frustrated. Lost everything for nothing.

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