Thursday, December 16, 2021

Kinda, Sorta Back on My Feet

I'm partial weight bearing! I went to the doctor on December 10th for my 6 week surgical follow-up and the doctor was so happy with my progress. He said the x-rays looked fantastic, the bone is healing up, and everything looks great. No infection, no issues, so he told me I could move to the walker boot (no more splints!!!) and partial weight bearing. Then, in a few weeks, I could try to move to full weight bearing. So, it looks like I'll be walking on my own in another week or so... maybe.

I let the doctor know that I was scared to try to walk again. He seemed sympathetic to that, so it's probably something he hears from time to time. But, he said he was also a little bit glad I was nervous about it because it means I'll be cautious and not try to overdo it. He's right and wrong, because anxiety is something I live with every day and I'm impatient. Being afraid or worried is a default state for me. It might not slow me down from trying to get moving as quickly as possible because, while I know that I should take it easy, pushing through fear is a big part of my every day life. 

When we got home after that appointment, I tried to take a step by myself so I wouldn't fall off the porch and the pain was intense. Strangely, it wasn't the bones in my leg that hurt, it was my heel. I immediately didn't try that again. But, after that, I was also even more scared to try to walk because I'm not a fan of hurting and I've been in so much pain over the last two and a half months, I don't want to do something that's going to increase that. Jokes on me, though, because trying to walk again hurts. 

I used my crutches to partially weight bear to began hobbling around and, surprisingly, it was going pretty dang well. I could suddenly be vertical on my own. I learned how to get out of my chair without needing my knee scooter. In fact, the knee scooter isn't that compatible with the walking boot's weight, so it's better without the scooter. I could go into the tiny front bathroom in my house again without trouble, I could go into the kitchen for a tiny bit, and I could return to my diamond painting hobby for a little while before the pain in my foot became too much.

On Tuesday this week, the dreaded walker showed up. I got it off the porch all by myself even though it took forever for me to do so and got it set-up. And, not going to lie, it's made my life so much easier. It's helped with my atrocious balance issues and I bought a pouch for the front that helps me carry things, something I couldn't do with crutches. I still use the crutches to go up and down the stairs and I used the knee scooter to get out of the bathtub, because I'm not allowed to weight bear without the walker boot, but that's all. It's walker all the way.

Yesterday, I was able to take a shower by myself. I used my scooter to get out and my bath chair, but I did it without needing my husband's help. For the first time in more than two months, I did something for myself. I've also been able to do a bit of laundry and I did a load of dishes. I'm going to start trying to cook dinner again because ordering Door Dash all the time is for the birds. Not only is it unhealthy to eat out all the time, but it's crazy expensive to order food to the house.

It seems like I'm on the upswing, which is something I'm trying hard to remember when I'm feeling low. This whole ordeal has made my mental health pretty atrocious, but with the help of a loving, supportive husband and a very supportive family, I've been able to power through the down days. And, it's almost Christmas and the snow has finally come to Northern Utah, which is picking up my spirits. Onward and upward, as they say.